Middle son made a mistake. Scratch that. Middle son made a poor choice. A seriously poor choice. One for which consequences, both natural and parental controlled, are yet to be determined.
The decision and ensuing course of events had to be addressed. He knew he messed up. I didn’t have to tell him that. When he admitted his error, I agreed with him and reminded him that it’s big and it’s his to fix. I also reminded him that one extremely poor choice does not make him a bad kid. He’s the same pretty good kid who has a current smear on his record. A smear that will fade away and likely never be repeated.
He couldn’t accept that. He argued that he couldn’t have done what he did and still be “good.” He felt bad enough that he wanted to wallow in sadness and perhaps a little self-pity. Finally, I looked him straight in both eyes and said, “You cannot live in Loserville.” This caught his attention and he replied, “What the heck are you talking about?”
I explained I meant exactly what I said. Remorse over a poor choice, bad action, etc., is appropriate. Encouraged even. I told him it’s okay to stay in that mode for a bit. But then it’s time to put it behind and resolve to never have it happen again. And living like a loser just keeps dragging a guy down.
I spoke the words that he is more than this situation and is created for better than living a mediocre life and then feeling sorry for himself about the place in which he’s found himself.
And you know what? He got it. It was one of my finer parenting moments. Not because I’m wise but because the words were inspired by God’s divine words that reminds us who we are, who we belong to, and what we are made for.
How about you? Where are you choosing to live? If you’re in Loserville, even temporarily, move out!